A Relationship Speculator (Flash Fiction #45)

Image by Jamie Nakamura from Pixabay

Pammy: “I’ve never seen Armei and Arhu quarreling this much before. Almost everything Arhu said, his wife Armei objected. I wonder what has happened to the two. I observed them at the party. Glad the party is over and we are home now.”

Pammy’s husband Pan: “Really? I hardly noticed. Is that what people are talking about in your women’s grapevine?”

Pammy: “Can you stop watching your soccer game? You don’t even look at me when I talk to you. You’ve been watching too much soccer lately and paying no attention to anything else. I am going to call Comcast tomorrow to cancel ESPN.”

The phrase “cancel ESPN” finally attracts Pan’s attention. ESPN is a sports channel that Pan loves, on which he regularly watches soccer and professional wrestling. Pan wanted ESPN+ to watch martial arts, but Pammy refused to go that far to indulge Pan’s sports enthusiasm.

Pan: “Don’t do that. It will take hours to restore the service afterwards. I am all ears. Let’s talk about Armei and Arhu.”

Pammy: “I just feel sad to see them being this way. They used to be so relaxed and happy together.”

Pan: “Come on. Your idea of a good relationship is too unrealistic. Real relationships take many forms. People quarrel and people patch up.”

Pammy: “True. Love does have ebbs and flows. Or they probably want to spice up their relationship by disagreement so that they feel the sweetness of patching up later on. Hey, you glue your eyes to the soccer game again.”

Pan: “It’s Euro 2020. I have to watch it. By the way you worry too much sometimes. Let it go.”

Pammy: “How about Lil and her husband Lang? They never talk much. They both like to talk, but just not to each other. They’ve been this way for years. Have you noticed in today’s party they didn’t speak a word to each other. Hey, I am talking to you. Are you listening?”

Pan: “Wait, it’s a goal. I think the Italians are going to score. Or well, false alarm. What are you saying? Lil and Lang? I think they’ve talked enough at home. When they are out partying, they want to talk with others. Why are you spending your time watching other people at a party and then thinking about them at night? I mean if you have time, make some rice wine and tofu yogurt for me to enhance our relationship.”

Pammy: “My eyes on people; your eyes on soccer ball.”

Pan: “Pammy, you are a speculator. I am a financial analyst and I know what a speculator is–she makes risky speculations. You observe others and then you speculate. Once Wall Street invited a monkey to sit there, who could pick stocks just as effectively as any speculator. What does that tell you? It means speculation is no more than random guess. You only know the superficial phenomena according to your superficial observation–you don’t know what’s going on in their relationship.”

Pammy: “Are you compare me to a monkey? That’s it. I am calling the cable company to cancel your ESPN right now.”

25 thoughts on “A Relationship Speculator (Flash Fiction #45)

  1. How to draw a man’s attention- cancel ESPN or Supersport subscription/ turn off the TV while they are watching a match. I don’t recommend any of the two πŸ˜‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOL. Thank you for pointing this out. I would say this is a classic battle between man and woman–like Adam and Eve– and I am more on Pammy’s side. Pan often has his “common sense” wisdom, but Pammy is willing to take the risk and not afraid of being wrong.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, I can’t heIp but be on Pammy’s side more often than not. Pan does need to be better at listening, and maybe he will be one day! I could read about their interactions all day long 😊

        Liked by 2 people

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