Image by inno kurnia from Pixabay
This is the second part of the story. The first part of the story is here.
Taimu unexpectedly shows up at the Ivy Training Center.
“Why did you come? I told you I would come to pick up the kid. You know you never listen to me. That’s your problem.” Dana says.
“Sorry, my mind must be somewhere else when you talked with me. I am a little too busy recently. You know with the award ceremony and everything, I am quite beside myself.” Taimu says, making sure he emphasizes “award ceremony” so that people will hear it clearly.
Taimu doesn’t fit in the prevalent idea of a handsome man, but he’s very handsome in his own ways. He is not tall but very sturdy and broad shouldered; he has a healthy glow which is enhanced by his faint good-natured smile; he is very intelligent but not the fastidious type that annoys everybody. He is a perfect combination of the hardy Steppe Mongolians, the worldly Arabians from the Silk Road, the mixture of the outward agreement and the inner defiance of the Han Chinese, and the fierce blend of spirituality and shrewdness of the Tibetans. He is a hybrid, physically and mentally, of all the above.
Taimu’s humbleness has always endeared him to women in general, but it has also provoked them to tease and scold him.
“Taimu, your wife really sacrificed for you. Don’t forget that.” Pammy lectures him.
“Taimu, spend some money on your wife. Buy some gifts for her.” Ivy says.
“Taimu, your wife wastes all her artistic talent working as a waitress in a restaurant and a servant to you…” Lulan says.
Taimu is stunned by the bombardment and he says, “Oh, come on, Dana. I don’t think you have so many grievances. Our life is fine. I know what this is all about. You just need to get used to the idea of moving away from here. You are settled in here and doesn’t want to move, but you need to get used to my promotion. Now you are going to be a director’s wife.”
“Oh, goodness you are so clueless. You just don’t understand me, do you?” Dana says.
Just then, a class is over and a dozen or so students rush to the waiting room to meet their parents. Pammy leaves with Sam, while Ivy goes to hold the door for people to stream out. When the dust is settled and Lulan has the attention for Dana and Taimu, she finds that the two are still quarreling.
“Give me a break. You didn’t sacrifice your dancing career for me since you never had a dancing career to begin with. You can’t sacrifice something you don’t have. Your mother literally begged me to marry you so you would not end up in that shit hole that you call a professional troupe. All these entertainment industries. They are controlled by predatory big brothers. It’s like in South Korea, Taiwan, or Hong Kong.” Taimu says.
“Every profession has its dark side. You only see the bright side in your own profession. Anyway, being a performer is infinitely more desirable than being a slave like me, who can’t even buy a pretty hairpin.” Dana says.
“Oh, it’s your hairpin story again, isn’t it? How many times are you going to mention this hairpin? I’ve been breathing under the tyranny of your hairpin for years. I told you to go get it, but you won’t because you want to use it as a symbol. ‘I am so mistreated that I can’t even buy a hairpin.’ or ‘I am so good at managing the household and exercising self control that I don’t even buy a hairpin.'” Taimu fumes.
The two argues and argues until their son finishes his class.
“I argue so much with you that I forget about an important thing. I want to ask Lulan to edit my speech in the award ceremony next week.” Taimu says and pulls out a piece of paper, on which he has written his thoughts all over.
Dana has to go home to cook. So Dana leaves with the son first, while Taimu is left behind to talk with Lulan.
The last part of the story is here.
Haoyan Do 
I always enjoy your stories because I have experienced similar situations or heard similar things so many times myself. SO MANY men use that excuse of you never had a career before me and so many women cling on to what may have been had they never gotten married.
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So true. So true. People usually get married before their career get really under way. Of course women’s career are not really called a career yet and only in early development. A good career requires years of hard work. Not only this, gaslighting and dismissing is such a daily routine that one often accepts it as a social or family norm. It is so disheartening. Our language is really a tool for suppression sometimes.
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Yeah gaslighting and dismissing is definitely very common and I think it was much worse back in the day. That’s why women are labelled as being hysterical or emotional and dismissed on that basis even though a lot of time they are just expressing themselves.
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So true. So true. Some families are better than others, but in varying degrees women have to watch themselves. Whatever they do can be considered offensive just because the system is not designed for their development. Women are not supposed to talk, laugh, sneeze, chat loudly. If one pays all the attention to the restrictions, one might as well stop living and breathing since there’s no time left for it. In addition, just last week, I was annoyed that men always think that women’s expression is a reaction rather than an expression. That’s not true. Women have their own expressions, not in reference to any men. If women say something, it could be just an expression, not because she is trying to react to a man around her.
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Haha! There’s so much going on. I am eagerly waiting for the next part. Great writing, Haoyan! The hair pin…LOL! 🙂
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Yes, I hope I can get the last part finished today. If not, it will be tomorrow. Thank you for your kind encouragement.
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Welll… Taimu has a point. “You can’t sacrifice something you don’t have.”
Sounds like years of resentment and misunderstanding built up on both sides.
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That’s so true. Men sometimes say that women’s sacrificed career is not a career anyway. However that’s because women haven’t got the chance and time to develop it. Of course a fledgling career is still not a real career. Usually a career requires ten years of development to sharpen the skill and forge relationships–a lot of women don’t have the time and energy. if they do have the chance, they have to sacrifice their family and their children. If they want to do both, their health will be totally ruined. I have witnessed all three options and none is completely satisfactory to women.
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Yes. Wow. She’s mourning wasted potential, what could have been. I think the idea that women can “have it all” is pretty inaccurate. From what I’ve seen it’s like health, career, kids: pick 2 out of 3. Of course if a woman has money to hire help with housework and childcare, she might be able to have all 3. But otherwise…it’s tough.
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So true. Only rich women can have it all. Or in the Asian community, many grandmothers will take more than half of the responsibility of the grandchildren. Only under such a circumstances, a woman can try to have it all. However recently even grandmothers stop working so hard. For example, in South Korea and Taiwan, the birth rate is plunging towards 1.0 each couple. I think the reason for that is obvious: the grandmothers are going on strike.
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There is a lot of drama!
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Haha. I wish I can come up with a good plot, but this is the only one I can come up with.
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