My Self Sabotaging Mind (Flash Fiction)
Flash Fiction #180 I’ve always had this feeling that anything I write doesn’t come out as I would like it to come out. I don’t know why I feel this way, but I do. I can’t even articulate why this is the case. What is the problem? What is the gap between what’s in my…
The Attachment Theory
I can’t believe I am so devious. I am definitely not. Well, I never consciously want to be devious, but probably my subconscious sabotages me in ways that I am not aware of. Anyway, all these thoughts come from the fact that I encountered an attachment test. Usually I don’t take such tests since I…
My Trigger In Full Display
I was very agitated, so much so that I couldn’t get my mind off it even if I knew I should be doing something else. I had no reason to be so agitated since it was not something that concerned me. Something happened to somebody else and I was just an outsider, being a friend…
Against Our Competitive Instincts
I have stopped playing Wordle now because I think it feeds the kind of narcissistic thinking that I want to get rid of. I just read a book about how to deal with emotionally immature people, which include narcissists. In it, the author, a psychologist, said that narcissists tend to like games—board games or trivial…
Friday Before Thanksgiving
I am already planning what to buy tomorrow, which is the last day one can get quality groceries from mainstream American stores. After tomorrow, one has to wait until after Thanksgiving for the stores to refill its shelves to the normal level. This year will be the first year in my life that I encounter…
The Rice Snack
I’ve heard about the rice problem for several weeks, but I’ve never acted on it or tried to stock up on rice products. One reason is that I’ve been busy and haven’t paid attention to what is happening around me for a while. Another reason is that whenever I step into the Asian grocery stores,…
From Boring To Interesting
If I hear one more complaint, like “it’s boring”, I will explode and blast my fragile good girl image to pieces. I am not afraid of explosions, but I am wary of the consequences since I have to clean up the mess, rehabilitate my reputation, and extinguish the fire of self doubt. I think it…
Feeling Normal Again
Suddenly, last week, I came down with an upset stomach and a diarrhea for a day and a half, which resulted in my lying in bed for most of the time, except when answering phone calls. I feel that a person’s voice is different when standing vertically or lying horizontally. This is why I never…
A Lot To Think, But Nothing To Write
canva stock image I have nothing to write today. I did something thinking today and realized that I just couldn’t write three posts at once and schedule them for the next three days. I can’t do it. I also can’t make a schedule, block up a time period, and ask myself to write for the…
Cultural Differences On Beauty (Continued)
canva stock image This is the second half of the post. The first half is here. Two Different Systems Many people have two different aesthetic systems in their mind. For me and many other Asians who speak and utilize English as a second language, we have two distinct aesthetic systems, one connected with English and…
Cultural Differences On Beauty
canva stock image A food-and-travel video blogger on YouTube, whom I watch regularly, is putting up a video about his wife going for cosmetic surgery in Thailand. As you know, Thailand and South Korea are the places to go to become more “beautiful” for people living in the vicinity. I really feel…. Well, judging from…
A Different Perspective
I ran into L today in the supermarket. As you know, I have lost my interest in shopping for groceries ever since the inflation started. I used to like looking for coupons, buying discount stuff, and feeling the pleasure of saving money while spending money. However, recently coupons are hard to come by, discounts are…
Vegan Dishes For The End Of Summer
As you know I am an “almost vegan” who can never be a real vegan but who eats only a little bit of egg or meat every day. For example, an occasional egg white for breakfast, or a strip of turkey bacon for a sandwich. And the secret of being an almost vegan is to…
The Professor’s Wife (Flash Fiction Part 2)
This is the second part of the story. The first part is here. It turns out that Alotus’ father died two weeks ago and she just came back from attending the funeral overseas. She describes her journey and I express my condolences. Then as we walk, we veer towards meaningless pleasantries and mutual congratulations on…
The Professor’s Wife (Flash Fiction Part 1)
Flash Fiction #170 I meet Alotus from time to time in stores, financial seminars, children’s events etc. I wouldn’t call her my particular friend since she is the kind of person who has a perfect life, who concentrates on her perfect family, who has no need for outside friendship, who tends to talk about “facts”…
Haoyan Do 